Wow. What a night. I woke up this morning with Lil’ Smokies for eyelids feeling like it was all a surreal dream. Baggins white knuckling my hand all morning reminded me that it wasn’t.
Hubs and I went to bed last night and lay awake talking about God, religion, and the struggles I’ve been having lately with these things and the things that live inside of my heart. It was emotional and exhausting, but he was so insightful and reassuring. I used the last of my energy to pray with all I had for guidance, for understanding. I was struggling so much with what I felt in my heart and what I read and heard from others. I prayed desperately for all of this, but both of us were wiped and quickly I fell asleep. Not long after that Baggins was crying- nothing too surprising as we have struggled with sleep issues for the last 4 years, particularly around Daylight Savings time. After getting up twice I just conceded to sleeping in her bed beside her for a little bit. I felt like I had only just fallen asleep when there was a knock at the door.
The knock quickly turned into banging and door jiggling. Hubs was up and out of bed and loudly asking whom it was. There was no reply and in the commotion the door was unlocked. Immediately the person on the other side was trying to shove the door open and Hubs was yelling and doing all he could to shut it. The kids were screaming and Hubs was yelling for me to grab the phone and call the police. Still dazed, I grabbed the phone and dialed 911. Hubs was able to re-lock the door and look out the peephole informing me that there was a woman that was going up and down the halls and was the one trying to break in. I quickly relayed this to the dispatcher who informed me that other calls from our building had been made and that the police were on their way.
Frightened beyond belief, the kids were still crying and screaming. The banging subsided and all was quiet for a few minutes while we huddled together on the bed. The police quickly arrived and Hubs spoke with them, made a statement and I did my best to console the children still not really grasping what had happened. All I knew is that we were all a bit shaky and pale and I was feeling nauseated as the adrenaline coursed through me.
Later, Hubs informed us that the woman he saw through the peep-hole had been topless and running around knocking on several doors and breaking the glass doors of the fire extinguisher case (all while remaining eerily silent). Upon further questioning by the police it was clear she was confused and disoriented. She wasn’t sure of anything but her first name and was unable (or unwilling) to say where she lived, wasn’t sure of where she was or how she had gotten here and there was good suspicion by the was she was acting that she was on drugs (which would explain the superhuman strength). He also learned from the caretaker that she had recently found used drug paraphernalia on site- something I’m still upset we hadn’t been informed of. He reassured the girls that the woman was taken to the hospital and that the police would make sure everything was safe as we all four squished into our queen size bed with our shaky dog and tried desperately to fall back asleep.
Now Baggins has already spent the last two months worried throughout the day about fires and strangers in the apartment. She has asked repeatedly if we keep the doors locked, she has remarked that sometimes when she comes into our room to sleep on the floor she lays on papa’s side so that if strangers break in then they won’t see her and be able to take her. This fear has now become only more real. We spoke before bed about how the woman was sick and didn’t know what she was doing. That she was confused and most likely trying to find where she was staying. We reminded her that we were safe; that the lock had kept the “bad person” out; that papa had protected us as he has always said her would. We said a prayer to thank God for keeping us safe, for giving papa the strength to protect us, for the police coming so quickly and we said a prayer asking for God to help the woman “get better”. All moments are teachable moments in grace.
Today we talked more about the idea that drugs might have been involved, what those are and why they are so bad. We talked about the fact that the woman may have lived in our building or been visiting, but that the police and the apartment staff would figure this out and that more than likely those people would be made to move out as our building does not tolerate drug use. We reassured them that everyone would remain safe. That didn’t stop Baggins from making me hold her had while she went into her closet to get socks; to make me hold her hand while she put on her shoes; to nearly cry in our elevator; to cry when I made her get in the back seat of the car while I stayed outside to scrape the windshield. Bear, well, she just shrugged it off and asked Baggins why she was so upset.
Part of me is angry about this violation. That isn’t the type of neighborhood and building that we live in. We joke often about how we feel like we live in a retirement community. Part of me still feels like the whole thing was some crazy dream and if it wasn’t for my scared child and my Lil’ Smokie eyelids I wouldn’t believe it. Another part is wondering if it wasn’t a lesson for all of us, but for me about the roles of men and women and of the household. That the Bible isn’t trying to tell me it’s some 1950’s sitcom patriarchy, but more about the way in which we are built- my husband automatically springing to action to protect us (as is his nature), me automatically springing to block the kids then later to soothe them (as is my nature). Instead it is a complementary partnership, a team, each of us loved by our creator as much as the other, neither of us lesser or with jobs less vital. Sometimes lessons are best learned the hard way *wink*. I’ve really got to be more specific in my prayers to God- like when I ask for patience & am given plenty of opportunities to practice it… Not what I had in mind.
The United States government reported in 2008 that approximately 13 million people over the age of 12 have used methamphetamine—and 529,000 of those are regular users. In 2007, 4.5% of American high-school seniors and 4.1% of tenth grade students reported using methamphetamine at least once in their life. This number has decreased slightly over the last few years, but not much.
If you aren’t aware of the devastation of drug use, please educate yourself.
Want to know more about meth or see the damage yourself? Go HERE.